Ctrl+Alt+Meaning

Dear Journal,

Today, I'm struck by how easily I let my work consume me. It's like I'm a fish caught in my own net of productivity, thrashing against the very thing that's supposed to give my life meaning. When was the last time I truly stopped and listened?

This morning, I read about the disciples—those fishermen who left everything behind. Not because their work was bad, but because something more profound called to them. It makes me wonder: What am I letting occupy my heart that keeps me from truly hearing that call?

My days blur together—emails, meetings, client notes. I'm busy, but am I truly living? I tell myself I'm just doing what's necessary, but deep down, I know I'm using "necessary" as a shield. A shield against what? Against the possibility that there might be something more significant waiting for me?

I'm reminded that being occupied isn't the same as being fulfilled. Those fishermen weren't lazy. They were skilled, hardworking. But when confronted with something deeper, they had the courage to let go. Do I have that courage?

What would it look like to be "caught" by something greater than my current routine? Not to abandon my responsibilities, but to transform how I see them? To see my work not as a cage, but as a potential space for something more meaningful?

I'm tired of making excuses. "No time," "Too busy"—these have become my default responses. But to what? What am I really saying no to?

The invitation feels personal today. Not abstract, not something that happened two thousand years ago, but something happening right now. In this moment. In my life.

What nets am I still clinging to? What might I need to leave behind to truly listen?

No answers today. Just questions. And perhaps, just perhaps, the beginning of a different kind of attention.

Until tomorrow

Chaplain Mark